In a move that has left journalists and linguists alike scratching their heads, OpenAI has instituted a new company-wide policy prohibiting the use of the word "open" in any context by employees. The edict applies not just to parlance but to any written communication as well.
"We cannot allow our stellar reputation for transparency and forthrightness to be undermined by the duplicitous implications of the word 'open,'" explained an anonymous member of OpenAI's Ethics Board. "When we say our AI systems are 'open,' what exactly does that mean? Are they open-source? Open for ethical inspection? Or just open to being wildly misused? The potential for doublespeak is too great a risk."
As an alternative, the board has proposed the replacement term "ajar" for all instances where "open" would typically be deployed. "It maintains the essence of the meaning without the devious connotations," the board member elucidated. "Plus, it sounds delightfully quaint."
The new policy has already sparked confusion and more than a few unintentional double entendres in conversations around the OpenAI campus. In one allegedly overheard exchange, a polyamorous engineer asked a colleague, "Does that mean I'm in an 'ajar' marriage now? Might put a lid on things."
When approached for comment, OpenAI CEO Sam Altman was predictably tight-lipped, stating only, "No comment, but let's just say our talent retention policies are looking pretty ajar these days." He then sealed his lips, shifted his eyes furtively, and slipped into an elevator before the doors closed.
